Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Cancer On My Mind

Yes, Literally! A 4mm spot has appeared in my Cerebellum! I have been trying desperately to get into a Clinical Trial for weeks and weeks- and it seems like every step of the way I've had something come up that looks like it will knock me out right off the bat. It seemed like Tampa and Philly were the only trials coming along nicely, but I went over the trial managers head at Tampa while she was on vacation and talked directly to the drug company. After reviewing my case they decided I wouldn't be a good candidate. I was holding out for a trial in Philly - but the Philly trial wanted something that was easy to biopsy. I have cancer deep in the cavity of my chest, lungs and possibly in my small intestine. I also have a small lump on my arm, so I went to the clinic to have it biopsied. It was benign, Hooray?*~##@*! But this time I wanted it to be cancer- because it was a requirement to get something biopsied to get on the trial!

Anyway, after the biopsy I was chatting with my Doctor about how I'd been feeling - tired, clumsy, overheated- (driving around without air conditioning) and I've even been dropping things as well. My typing skills have gone way down the pan. My doctor's words were 'Uh Ho!' and, he scheduled me for a Brain MRI.
I thought nothing of it at the time. I ran right out to fax some papers over to NYU thinking I'll be in NY in a few weeks! My oncologist had told me he wanted me to go under the care of Dr Anna Pavlick @ NYU, as she is a melanoma specialist. So while I'm out faxing NYU some green-light papers - Dr Morse is emailing me that I have a 4mm Brain Tumor. You can see how this puts a damper on my plan!

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Today I had to have head mask made for me out of plastic mesh. I had been freaking out about it all day - the hot plastic was then laid on my face and pushed around until it formed to my features. I then laid there until it hardened. I felt trapped!!!! Then a damn FLY started landing on me, dancing around on my legs and then buzzing around my vice-gripped face. GET IT OFF ME!!!!






What I had been fearing for the last few days, was indeed horrible! Thank God I had my Rooster by my side making jokes and reading me his hospital observation poetry!
This also sums up the way I felt -

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That last line should be -"Are You Caught Forever By The Curse Of The MRI"

I go in to have my brain box zapped on Tuesday the 24th! YIKES!


I'll let everyone know how it goes!

On a much better note I have a NEW Tape out called, Moon Mountain by me, Letha Rodman Melchior, on the great Label Called

I am so happy to have these works out in the world - working on this collection gave me something to look forward to and to keep my mind from going into dark places. 
Thank you to you Ryan Martin for making it happen.

Please get yours at Robert and Leopolds website.
There are so many fantastic artists on that label, and I am honored to be among them!




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